Hello Friends!

Yep it's your pal, Ruth. Sorry I haven't updated in almost two months. Student teaching is essentially my life, along with making money in the spare time I have. Not only is student teaching amazing but there has been a renaissance of myself. I'm reading. Books. Learning Italian. Exploring new music genres. Alumni from the sorority = all the fun, none of the meetings or copious amounts of money. (I forgot how much money I used to have when I wasn't in the sorority...let's be honest. I love you guys. But the t-shirt and dinner money goes towards GASP bills!)

I've also lost about 15 pounds. I've been kinda sitting at the same weight for a couple weeks. BUT. I just joined a gym so I'll be working out. 17 bucks a month mofos. Life without Mountain Dew and Wendy's is...weird. But good weird.

And the alcohol! Oh how I missed you! I'll still have a glass of wine or some drinks when I go out on those rare occasions but...I miss being hammered a couple times a week.

Kids in my class love Legos, Star Wars, Lego Star Wars, Pokemon (still! I know, right?!?! I love it!), horses (none of them are baller enough to own them but I'm sure they could), Wii, screaming, Bosco sticks for lunch and me. I love them too.

I've been trying to get Dave to embrace more of his Italianness so we're being Rocky (him) and Mickey Goldmill (me) for Halloween. It's going to be awesome. For school, however...banana. The kids'll go nuts.

Facebook's ads are ridic. Plan B? Really?

That's all I have to say right now. It's early. I'm alive. Woot.

Stuff White Boyfriends Do

I love Stuff White People Like. Why? Because I love being white, other white people and celebrating the fact that I am white. I also like it because I can relate to some of it and am just like 'Oh yeah I totally know people like that.' It's hilarious and well-written and the guy has a book.

I've also further solidified that Dave is much much whiter than I am. I've known this for quite some time. That's why I like him, because the view from Lower-middle-class-my-dad-still-works-in-the-auto-industry-blue-collar-ville makes Dave's upper middle class lifestyle very savory. I mean, come on, his parents own wine glasses from a wine tasting they went to...IN NEW ENGLAND! I can assume his mother makes more than both of my folks did when they both worked combined (and she's a teacher). He lives in a pretty classy neighborhood. He always has a dazzling array of deli meats, whereas if you were to peek into my fridge, you would notice that my bologna has a first name AND a last name. His uncle moved to Vermont after getting a degree in Environmental Studies (or Environmental Science...I can never keep those two straight). The neighbors across the street own three cars and only two of the house residents are of legal driving age (the next oldest will be in approximately 12 years). He loves Apple products way more than I do (I'm typing this on my 600 dollar Dell).

However I own a North Face (I think he owns Columbia...GROSS), I want to learn Italian (via the knock-off Rosetta Stone I saw at Best Buy for 50 bucks!!!) and I really do love going to plays, even though I haven't gone since I was required to do so in my Introduction to Humanities course. But we have no problem with yelling about how evil Wal Mart is to Dave's mom, commenting how much we like Flight of the Conchords even though we've collectively seen five episodes, sipping on wine (we have our own favorite Chianti), watching Wes Anderson movies or riding our bicycles (excuse me, both of us riding Dave's bicycles...told you he was super white).

I hate the fact that, when I do something nice, she says 'That was nice of you.' Like how my parents' friend fixed up my car, when he came over, I said 'Thank you so much, I love how my car runs now'. She immediately follows with 'That was very nice of you.' Like I'm five and I was told to thank the kind lady for the cookie she gave me.

Whoever said you can't work during student teaching is not in touch with reality. I would like my school to call my credit card company, as well as my parents, and tell them I won't be paying my bills for the next four months. Go ahead, School of Education. I DARE YOU.

Two years after everyone else did, my nagging curiosity led me to find and finally view 2 Girls 1 Cup. I really could have gone my whole life without seeing that. I think my burning retinas do as well.

Big whoop, wanna fight about it?

I guess, because I'm not bored in class over the summer or in front of a computer at work, I haven't really had much to talk about.

I got a volunteer job with Delta Phi Epsilon's Extension Research team. They'll email me stuff and I do it and send it back. Although it would be cool to live in Philly. I'm also working to hopefully restart the Metro Detroit Alumnae Association. Yeah, I went alum and all I want to do is do Deepher stuff. That's gross.

I am scared SHITLESS about student teaching. Like terrified. I'm scared of getting up (or attempting to get up) at 7:30 every morning again, which I haven't done since my freshman year of college when I thought it was a good idea to schedule a 7:50am Pre-Calc class. I'm scared of working until 3:30. I'm scared of doing lesson plans and teaching. As outgoing as I am, I'm scared I'm not going to do it right. Like I'm just going to get up there and stutter and the six year olds are going to laugh at me. I'm scared I won't learn the new science curriculum. I'm scared that I won't be able to go to the bathroom when I need to because I'll be teaching (shut up, it's a concern). I'm scared I won't be able to pay my bills because I'll be working for free.

Side note: WHOEVER THOUGHT THAT STUDENT TEACHING SHOULD NOT BE PAID IS A BIG FUCKING IDIOT. JUST SAYING.

I'm scared that I'll be exhausted beyond belief by student teaching and working, with coaching starting again in November. It's overwhelming. And I put off student teaching for good reason but now, holy shit, it's coming. September 1st. It's not something I can say 'Hey I'm doing that next year, in the fall, soon...' Nope. It's here. All those clothes and nice shoes I bought I can utilize for more than dressing up to go to Bailey's or to feel good about myself. Nope, those are work clothes now, fool.

Maybe I should have stuck to my 11th grade original plan and just majored in English and become a famous author.

Bangs is becoming unbearable. Everything that comes out of her mouth is either a screech or a whine. It's awful. I'm concerned for her but she has made it very clear she does not need my help. She dyed her hair brown, though, and it doesn't look as bad as I originally thought. She's still better blond. Big Blond BANGS.

Dave and I are good. Over eight months. He's awesome. What else do you want me to say? OMGZZZ I LUVZ HIM HE IZ SoooOoOo KeWL. Is that better? I finally found something I'm better than him at: Rummy. And my parents seriously love him more than me. When I come home and he's with me they're like 'heyruth...HIIIIIIII DAAAAAAAAAVE.' I would too. He's a better person than I will ever be. That's why I love him.

I'm one of Shatley's bridesmaids and, in case you were wondering, because you were, I am the Fat Bridesmaid. I have the biggest boobs and probably the biggest dress size. (You know you're stacked when you have to pay extra for plus size dresses...W00T.) I'm going to fuck up her pictures with my whale thighs.

Where did this summer go? And why do I have five dollars in my checking account to show for it?!

Dave was visibly upset at a preview for The Cleveland Show. It looks completely unrelated to Family Guy. Thus it could either be unfunny or completely hilarious. I'm putting the money on the first one.

So Value World. I spent approximately 50 dollars and I now have a closet full of clothes. I won't look like a hobo who wears two outfits when I'm student teaching. Hooray!

When the hell did J-Lo turn 40?

Pleated jean skirts. I would like to find a time in history when those were attractive. Because they definitely are not.

I'm watching Steel Magnolias not in the presence of my mother for the first time so now I don't have to comfort my mom and instead know what happens in the end.

Yeah.

My parents have decided to fight in the battle against skin cancer on the other side by driving and paying for Bangs to go tanning three times a week.

I really have not accomplished anything this summer. I read the entire Twilight series, met Jen Lancaster, have minimized my debt and have become much happier (due to less stress) but I do not feel like I have done ANYTHING.

It's so fucking hot out. Why do people who have pools not invite cool people like me over?