Pet Peeves - Texts from Bangs

I thoroughly despise the fact that my parents pay for everything Bangs wants...ever. Especially her phone with unlimited everything. Which means unlimited texts to me. At least once a day I get an 'R u home?' when she should know by now that, during the week, between the hours of 8am and 6pm, 99 times out of 100 I'm not. On the weekends, around 10pm I get a 'Where r u?' or 'R u comin home 2nite?' As if having two parents wasn't enough, I get Mom Junior over here annoying the shit out of me via text.

As of late, I guess my every day behavior (literally) has been pissing her off beyond belief and I get angry texts. Today, for example, I wanted breakfast. The Crispix was gone. We had about a half bowl of Apple Jacks left. And the Rice Krispies had my mother's name on it (yes, 'Mom's cereal' was on the box). So I went downstairs. Lo and behold we have ten boxes downstairs. But we're not one of those cool families when you can eat whatever one you want. No. We're allowed two cereals open at a time. But if I can't touch one of them, that leaves me one option and that's not cool. And no one shit when I ate the Crispix. I chose Peanut Butter Crunch, a delicious treat in a bowl. Around 3:55pm, I receive the following text:

"DO NOT OPEN SHIT LIKE ITS YOURS. LEAVE MY GOD DAMN CEREAL ALONE. BUY YOUR OWN SHIT. YOU ARE A BIG GIRL."

I was extremely impressed that anger causes her to spell things out correctly. (If that truly works, I believe someone should be beating the shit out of her at school constantly so she does better.) We exchanged a few more texts until finally I was like "Unless you have something important to say, do not text me."

I'm seriously considering a change of my maid of honor. Bangs is driving me up a wall. "But Ruth, she's 16!" No. No. She's been ruining my life for 16 years. Ugh.

But what's nice about the unlimited everything is that she's always on her phone at the house. So she doesn't talk to me. And annoys everyone else via cell phone. It's a blessing.